Feeling a little blue? Or maybe you’re in kind of a life rut these days, or worse. Maybe you’re barely able to drag yourself from bed to work and back, finding nothing particularly sparky or compelling, miserably eking out a subsistence existence, your only companions loneliness, angst, and sadness. You’re asking yourself existential questions and sporadically bursting into tears. You can’t focus on anything. Why are we even here?
My friend, you are not alone. Even the most mentally composed suffer sporadic bouts of depression. It’s part and parcel of the human condition, at least for anyone who’s paying attention.
But now there’s a product that offers relief, gives you the ability to pull yourself out of the abyss and re-join the human race. With the ritually charged overcome depression candle, you can “magically awaken yourself to see the beauty in the world once again.” Simply light the candle and hang around while it burns. It doesn’t even involve pharmaceuticals, at least we don’t think it does. We’re suddenly too happy and carefree to bother reading the ingredient list.
